A Thousand WOrD PhotoS

My name is Maria, and I am seven years old. At least, that’s the lie I have to tell. I relax in the pool, my foam floater wrapped around me as I stretch out on my back. The sun is warm on my skin, my long hair wet as it tickles my neck. I wish I could find scissors and cut it short, but Mama keeps them locked away. I kick out with my feet and the water soothes my sun-tanned skin. I squeeze my eyes shut so I can’t see the fencing around our back yard. There is pointy wire on top, and funny prickly plants line the other side. Mama said they’re called cactus. There are a lot of them around ‘cos we live in a place called Mexico now. Mama drove us a long way to get here. People are looking for us, and she says it’s her job to keep us safe.

 

I haven’t been to school for a very long time. Mama teaches me at home, and I try hard not to make her cross. I miss my friends. There’s a boy next door, his name is Jacob, but I’m not allowed to speak to him. He’s a baby, only five, two whole years younger than me. Sometimes, when Mama is in bed with a headache, I sneak to the fence and speak to Jacob between the gap in the plants. It’s hard to see him ‘cos he’s afraid of the prickles, but it’s nice to talk to someone else. 

I climb out of the pool, grab my towel and leave wet footprints on the tiles as I walk inside. I smile as a tiny green lizard wriggles past. I used to be scared of them, but now lizards are my friends. My tummy rumbles as I walk into the kitchen. Mama’s left me some food. I sit at the table, staring at the framed photo of a little girl. Her name was Maria too. Mama said I look so much like her that it makes her want to cry. Maria fell asleep one day and never woke up.

 

Mama says it’s just us now, and I should forget everyone else. It makes my tummy ache when I hear things like that. She says that if my old family really loved me, then they wouldn’t have left me alone on the beach. But the sun made them sleepy, and it wasn’t their fault. I shouldn’t have left their side. I remember the big straw umbrella that we sat under, and daddy’s snores as he lay back on his sunbed that day. I can still see Mummy’s book resting on her chest as she fell asleep too. I only left them to splash in the water, and that’s when shefound me. At first, she said she was from the kid’s club and that I had to go with her. 

 

She lied. 

 

That feels like a long time ago, and I don’t want to live here anymore. I miss my real mummy and daddy. I want to go home. Tears prick my eyes as I think of them. I hear a door creak upstairs. Mama is coming down. Quickly, I clear the crumbs from my plate and tidy up after myself. I think about Jacob, and it makes my heart do a funny little dance in my chest. I wonder what he has done with the note I passed through the wire mesh. I told him to give it to a grown-up, so they could call for help. Jacob’s eyes had opened wide as his lips mouthed my real name. I watched as he scrunched it into his pocket and ran inside. I couldn’t call after him in case Mama heard. I didn’t think he would pass it on, but now I hear a whomp whomp sound over my head. 

 

I’m shivering now, but it’s not from the cold, and I pull my towel tighter around my shoulders. They are here. At last, they have come. But will they get to me in time? The beat of helicopter blades grows louder, sending Mama into a panic. Her face white, her shoes click-clack against the floor. ‘Come away from the doors,’ she shouts, her fingers pinching my skin as she grabs my arm. ‘Go to your room,’ Mama flings me towards the stairs. ‘Now!’

 

I freeze as strong fists hammer against our front door. ‘Police, open up!’ They shout, their thundery voices making me jump. Scooping me up in her arms, Mama rushes towards the back door, her dark hair brushing against my face. My teeth chatter in my mouth. I’m both excited and scared as police officers burst in through the door and rush towards her. She screams like an animal as I am tugged from her grip.

‘It’s OK,’ a policewoman says, her voice soft as she stares at my face. ‘What’s your name, sweetheart?’ She takes in my hair, my swimsuit, the pink varnish on my nails.

‘Daniel,’ I say, the word sounding alien on my tongue. I haven’t spoken my real name in so long. It doesn’t feel a part of me anymore. I follow the officer outside, and we wait in the police car as Mama is lead away in handcuffs, her head low. She looks over her shoulder at me one last time and I shrink back, afraid. I feel lost and alone. Police talk through their radios, saying my pretend mother has been dressing me up as a girl. I start to cry, but then I catch a flash of mummy’s wavy blonde hair as she wrenches open the car door. Tears stream down her face. ‘It’s him!’ She cries, opening her arms to pull me in. ‘Daniel!’ Her hug feels warm and golden. She is breathless but happy, and I inhale the welcome smell of her perfume. ‘My baby,’ she says, smothering me in kisses. ‘We’ve been searching for so long.’ 

My heart feels as big as the moon.